March 18th, 2009
“Patience serves as a protection against wrongs as clothes do against cold.”
Don’t worry–I didn’t learn this in school. Instead I found it after googling “patience” and “quotes” together.
In any case, please be patient. An epic post recounting epic spring break adventures is coming soon (for high school boys, who I’m pretty sure make up the majority of my audience, sorry, I didn’t go to Mexico, so no Girls Gone Wild). I’ve been to JO’s, I saw the future, and it was good. Trust me–I’ll tell you about it soon.
To whet your appetites, however, I give you the following–a letter that I and my spring break companions just sent to Dave Zabriskie, founder of DZ Nuts Chamois Cream:
“Dear Dave–
This message is from four college cyclists on spring break. Fortunately, spring break for us is not Cancun; rather, it is the roads and hills surrounding La Honda, California, including but not limited to Tunitas Creek Rd., which you climbed during the AToC–you may remember it as being steep as balls.
Speaking of balls, the purpose of this e-mail is to represent our resident “baller,” Nathaniel Herz. Nathaniel, or “Nat,” is an aspiring Cat. 3 cyclist, whose palmares include a 9th place in the local Scarborough training criterium. This was especially notable given the Zipp 404s being ridden by most of the masters in the field. I hear you like them, but in your case it does not make you a weenie master-blaster given your huge baller status, so don’t worry.
In any case, Nat’s huge baller status is widely recognized in the nordic skiing community, as he has a blog on the most popular (okay, the only) nordic skiing news website on the internet fasterskier.com–Nat’s blog is blogs.fasterskier.com/natherz). Nat frequently discusses such terms as “baller,” and “huge baller,” and also discusses cycling events at some length, such as the time he got dropped by Ted King at the Tour of the Hill Towns and ended up getting a free swordfish kebab about 20 miles from the finish. It was delicious.
1. Appearance in DZ nuts commercials, which could also appear on Nat’s blog.
2. Free DZ Nuts.
If you are interested in discussing such relationships, please contact us ASAP at natherz@gmail.com, or by phone at 207-841-4199 (if there is no answer, please leave a message, he will get back to you as soon as he can [if you forget this part, the message will remind you]).
Also, one of the co-signed authors of this e-mail is madly in love with your teammate Christian. Her name is Leah–we thought he might like that.
Happy St. Patty’s Day!
Nathaniel “Nat” “Huge Baller” Herz
Leah “I Heart CVdV” Ricci
Nick Crawford
Morgan “12th at the Beanpot” Macleod”
March 18th, 2009 at 6:42 am
You guys are amazing. You’re like masters…. but still young! I guess “huge baller” is the only way to describe you. I think the crowning moment of my trip to JN’s was when my J2 sister came up to me after the relay and told me “some weird guy from Maine was the ’s’ so we could spell ‘Alaska’ on our stomaches.” By the time I found out that it was you it was already too late. My chance to meet my fasterskier idol had already passed. Drowning in my sorrow I moped my way through the dance, barely taking notice of the hordes of mid west babes who just wouldn’t keep their hands to themselves.