So I’m headed to Canadia in a couple of days. One week in Canmore. Three weeks in Whistler. I would anticipate all kinds of unpredictable soggy astro-journalism form this poor little Alaskan. All in good time.
But, once again, this is FAR MORE IMPORTANT:
A/T Anonymous: A Tale of a Telemarker Turned A/T Skier from Jason Mitchell on Vimeo.
NOTE: The following information has been modified from it’s original form to decrease vulgarity and increase clarity. Hopefully
Read this first: http://www.johnnyklister.com/post/286940…
Holy **** ***kin harsh!
Harsh, but no argument from this native Anchoraguan.
#10 Locals don’t need studs. You need studs.
#9 I grew up eating there too, but only because my Dad was a pipeliner.
#8 I’m telling them for the LAST EFFING TIME, they need to have ANOTHER hunt in the park. In a 120 minute tempo last year I ran into 9 moose. NINE. How do you spell no natural predators in English??
#7 And you should have seen that **** in the 70’s. I wish I could have.
#6 Granted, the NSAA lost $250,000 to that ****ty registration service, but seriously, dirt on Nationals the sprint course? The Muni does get the rest of the city though.
#5 Ouch. I just sent the Arian Nation and the Crue a Christmas card. It’ll get there around Jan 5th, guys. NOTE: AMH is very kind to local racers.
#4 Ask for the Velvet Box.
#3 Remember when Arians said “don’t be a prick?” This is where they send Anchorage’s pricks when they are being bad. I used to wake up there when I fell asleep on the bus after school.
#2 I think I had a peice o’ that when I was five. He tasted like whiskey, shotgun pellets, and two-stroke oil.
#1 Word to the race jury (I know where you live), USE YOUR OWN THERMOMETERS!
Good luck every body. I’ll be shredding sick pow down here while the rest of you are enjoying the races.
Now GO SHOOT A FREAKIN MOOSE!
The Big Secret
Below are the interviews I conducted for this feature article about the clash between clubs and teams.
(more…)
Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You’re off to Great Places!
You’re off and away!
You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself any direction you choose.
You’re on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the guy who’ll decide where to go.
You’ll look up and down streets. Look’em over with care. About some you will say, “I don’t choose to go there.” With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet, you’re too smart to go down a not-so-good street.
And you may not find any you’ll want to go down. In that case, of course, you’ll head straight out of town. It’s opener there in the wide open air.
Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you.
And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.
Oh! The Places You’ll Go!
You’ll be on your way up!
You’ll be seeing great sights!
You’ll join the high fliers who soar to high heights.
You won’t lag behind, because you’ll have the speed. You’ll pass the whole gang and you’ll soon take the lead. Wherever you fly, you’ll be best of the best. Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.
Except when you don’t.
Because, sometimes, you won’t.
I’m sorry to say so but, sadly, it’s true that Bang-ups and Hang-ups can happen to you.
You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch. And your gang will fly on. You’ll be left in a Lurch.
You’ll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump. And the chances are, then, that you’ll be in a Slump.
And when you’re in a Slump, you’re not in for much fun. Un-slumping yourself is not easily done.
You will come to a place where the streets are not marked. Some windows are lighted. But mostly they’re darked. A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin! Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in? How much can you lose? How much can you win?
And if you go in, should you turn left or right…or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite? Or go around back and sneak in from behind? Simple it’s not, I’m afraid you will find, for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.
You can get so confused that you’ll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place…for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go or a bus to come, or a plane to go or the mail to come, or the rain to go or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow or waiting around for a Yes or No or waiting for their hair to grow. Everyone is just waiting.
Waiting for the fish to bite or waiting for wind to fly a kite or waiting around for Friday night or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants or a wig with curls, or Another Chance. Everyone is just waiting.
No! That’s not for you!
Somehow you’ll escape all that waiting and staying. You’ll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing. With banner flip-flapping, once more you’ll ride high! Ready for anything under the sky. Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!
Oh, the places you’ll go! There is fun to be done! There are points to be scored. There are games to be won. And the magical things you can do with that ball will make you the winning-est winner of all. Fame! You’ll be famous as famous can be, with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.
Except when they don’t. Because, sometimes, they won’t.
I’m afraid that some times you’ll play lonely games too. Games you can’t win ‘cause you’ll play against you.
All Alone!
Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you’ll be quite a lot.
And when you’re alone, there’s a very good chance you’ll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won’t want to go on.
But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike. And I know you’ll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are.
You’ll get mixed up, of course, as you already know. You’ll get mixed up with many strange birds as you go. So be sure when you step. Step with care and great tact and remember that Life’s a Great Balancing Act. Just never forget to be dexterous and deft. And never mix up your right foot with your left.
And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and ¾ percent guaranteed.)
Kid, you’ll move mountains!
So…be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray or Mordecai Ale Van Allen O’Shea, you’re off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So…get on your way!
————————-
————————-
Oh! The Places You’ll Go!
by the incomparable Dr. Seuss
“Many people say that if you want to be the best in sport and in cross country, you have to train the best, have the best technique, equipment and training apparatus. All of this is important, but at the same time I think that maybe this isn’t the most important. Something bigger and deeper has to happen. The foundation maybe has more to do with attitude and culture than about specific details. I believe this is where the most important key lies.”
- Translated from the forward of Thomas Alsgaard’s book, Best På Ski.
The one other guy in Jackson Hole that could have understood why I own lycra is moving to Whitefish, MT to coach juniors full time. Well, kids, this is a preview of what you’re in for:
Best of luck with that progressive ‘board stuff. See you in West.
Who wins for first in-town snow accumulation in the country. Here’s us right now (Oct 4th, 11:55pm MTN)
I’ll give a Jackson Hole update soon enough, but for now, this is more important.
Moms: If you don’t like people saying swear words then pause it when it goes black.
Can you guess what race the audio is from?
OK kids, you deserve a little face time too. Ja d’er så LETT! (It’s so EASY!)
We should do more of these. For you norskies, remember “Nissene paa loven?”
Life, baby, LIFE.
One day on some distant planet there’ll be six reporters taking mad pictures of me and my relay team in party wigs with our shirts off.
This one reminds me of doing skits in Folkehøskole. Is he imitating Oddvar Brå or David Beckham?
And I’m sure you’ve all seen this one already, but here’s a response to the “girls” on my last post. I’m sure those guys are on the National team even though they’re fat.
I DARE any of you to find a norwegian youtube video that doesn’t have boppy techno. (not that it sucks)
Talk again soon.
UPDATE: My audience seems to be a little wider than I thought, so I’ll fill you in. The following is a parody. Ha Ha. Also, the video at the bottom stars and was made by the three Norwegian national ski team members shown. Yes, they are hot, and yes, most people have seen it already.
Read thoroughly, look deep, and welcome to the inside.
The front headline on langrenn.com right now is “Kjølstad has the kissing disease.” And, they’ve got a shot of him “kissing” his waist bottle.
“Kyssesyken” is the herpesvirus that leads to mono.
(more…)
Loading up fasterskier.com is a sobering experience after living through the space I’ve been in the last 8 days. Burning Man is an intensely invigorating and spiritual experience where you will see some of the most beautiful people around. After a week of overstimulation and almost zero sleep, wayward Burners rise from the desert ashes charged and re-connected to an energy that they never knew they had.
(more…)
Last night I landed in Truckee. I’m almost broke, which means that my ‘09 road trip is almost over. But, nothing is over until The Man burns.
(more…)
Das EuroVan is working out great. if you see me running around, come say high and let’s do a workout. Das Vanen looks like this:
The little twist about my van lifestyle is that it is slightly geared towards getting outside and doing workouts.
(more…)
I set my alarm and so couldn’t sleep the night before I left Anchorage. Good thing, too, because I had to spend 2 hours looking for my passport even though I’d stuck it “in a safe place” when I moved out of my apartment.
With a wonderful early morning breakfast and last-off good bye from a close friend, I met up with my rider and headed down the highway towards the lower-48. I’d been waiting to get on the road for a really long time so the excitement was overshadowed by relief.
(more…)
I was just lying down for a post-workout nap when I welled up reading about Chris Severy’s death in “Running with the Buffaloes.” I just got to the part where he dies in a mountain bike crash and I started thinking back over the accidents and deaths we’ve had with athletes over this summer.
(more…)
It is amazing what good sleep can do for the body and soul. You know how you wake up after nine hours and there’s almost no transition from sleep to awake? You’ve been dreaming hard and wake up ready and stoked for anything.
(more…)
Kalgin Koch
Kalgin Koch, a friend of mine, died on Saturday during the Knoya Ridge Hill Climb yesterday here in Anchorage. He was 22. I read that Kalgin had a heart condition that caused some series of problems for him during the race, and medically trained racers were unable to revive him with CPR.
I coached Kalgin when he was on the track team at my old high school. He was one of those exceptionally talented runners that could have done quite a lot if guided through the proper channels.
I’ll never forget him leading our underdog 4×8 team to barely beat Dimond High at the 2004 Alaska state track meet. To get them to come together as a team I took those four guys on a rambo run on our high school trials a week before the meet and hammered them like a Sergeant into pushups and track drills in the marshes and muck. Then, banking on a psychological strategy against the favorite team, head coach Lisa Keller changed the relay order just before the race. We went out in the woods and secretly practiced the new handoffs and they just scraped out the win. Really fun times, guys.
I recently saw Kalgin for the first time in several years at Mount Marathon over the fourth, and as usual he was all jazzed up. He finished the grueling race without a problem. I feel so sad for that kid. It wasn’t anywhere near his time to go.
I wish nothing but the most support for his dad during the next few years. RIP, Kalgin.
I’ll writ about Crow Pass later, but for now, this is WAY MORE IMPORTANT.
Rob Whitney and Holly Brooks got married this weekend here in the mountains above Anchorage. This wedding was big, and not just because there were 320 people. Besides a cragratulations, all I’m going to say is that things went down at this wedding that I never thought I’d see from a bunch of city folk and there is no way that even someone with no filter like me can put up on a public site. It was awesome. Don’t forget, people – “Now you see the light, so *Stand Up For Your Right!”
Congrats you two…
Another one bites the dust…
Other Blogs
ADMIN